Discovering that your child is being bullied can be upsetting and distressing. As a parent or carer, your support and response can make a huge difference in helping your child feel safe, heard, and valued. 

1. Listen and Stay Calm 

If your child tells you they’re being bullied, try to remain calm and reassuring. It can be difficult to hear, but reacting with anger or panic may make them feel more anxious. Let them talk openly and listen without judgment. Avoid interrupting or rushing to fix the situation right away — simply being heard can be a huge relief. 

2. Reassure Them 

Let your child know it’s not their fault. Reassure them that they did the right thing by telling you and that bullying is never acceptable. Emphasise that they are not alone and that you will work through this together. 

3. Gather the Facts 

Ask gentle, open-ended questions to understand what’s been happening — who is involved, where and when it occurs, and how it makes them feel. Keep a written record if the bullying is ongoing. 

4. Talk to the School or Setting 

Schools have a responsibility to tackle bullying and should have policies in place. Contact your child’s teacher, head of year, or pastoral lead to share your concerns. Work collaboratively with them to create a plan to support your child and address the bullying. 

5. Build Confidence and Coping Skills 

Support your child’s self-esteem by encouraging activities they enjoy and helping them build strong, positive friendships. Role-play scenarios or discuss how they can respond safely to bullying, without encouraging retaliation. 

6. Monitor Their Wellbeing 

Bullying can affect a child’s mental and emotional health. Watch for signs of stress, withdrawal, anxiety, or changes in eating and sleeping habits. If you're concerned, consider seeking support from a school counsellor, GP, or mental health professional. 

7. Keep Communication Open 

Let your child know they can always come to you. Regular check-ins show you care and give them a chance to share any ongoing issues. 

Remember: Your belief in your child, and your consistent support, helps them feel stronger and more empowered — even in difficult times. 

Links for more information and support:

How can I help my child if they are being bullied? | NSPCC

Advice for parents and carers